3 Things to Do on a Rainy Day Unknown

Today is a dreary rainy day. It's been raining since late morning. Normally rain is the perfect excuse to stay indoors, snuggle in the covers and watch a movie. But today has been particularly restless for me.

My big plan was to go grocery shopping. Yes, that sounds like an odd thing to be designated a big plan. But the thing is I'm running out of produce at home. Because I have limited items at home, there's little I can make in the kitchen. That's why I wanted to get groceries today. Now I'm in a Catch 22 - I can't cook because I don't have enough items, and I can't go out to buy those items because it's raining, and because it's raining I have to remain indoors and look for something to do. And for some reason, I'm very hungry today so I can only think about food!

Oh, by the way, I don't have a car here so I have to walk. And it's one of those tropical thunderstorms, so I'd be drenched. The Catch-22 continues.

So finally, finally, I've decided to be more positive instead of moping around. All is not lost. So many others are going through much more than I. What right do I have to complain and waste the day? With that, I've come up with three productive things one can do on a dreary rainy day... besides watching Pride and Prejudice for the 30th time.

1. Organize the files on my computer

I'm a terrible digital file keeper. I normally don't have a system to begin with, so that's the problem. I just keep going with the flow and develop a hodgepodge system along the way. Eventually I end up with too many folders with overlapping labels and multiple copies of the same file. It can be frustrating and nags at me every time I save or download something. So actually, this is the best time to get this straightened out.

2. Read quality articles online

None of those viral videos and Buzzfeed, please. It's not that I don't love them. On the contrary, I get sucked into them easily. So here's to being more intentional with what I read and watch... especially with so many hours to waste utilize.

3. Write

Hence this post. There are a few more items on my to-do writing list, but I figured this is a good place to start.

And there you go, my attempt to redeem the remainder of the day.

Now I'm gonna go sort those files.

6 things I learned (or yet another list) Unknown

I find it ironic that when I finally get round to this post, it's a New Year's eve, but not the expected one.

Around this same time three years ago, I just learned that I got accepted into Monash. Boy, was I nervous! Away from family most of the time, forced to drive in KL traffic, thrown into formal education with its classrooms, assignments and 'unholy' learning, and surrounded by sooo many peers everywhere (I used to hang with people way older or considerably younger). Let's not forget the fact that the course would take three loooong years.

Lo and behold, three years came and went. I completed with my targeted CGPA (no, it's not 4.0), the last semester having the best results out of the six. And what has these years of studying taught me?

• The importance of a well-founded understanding of the world. Before studying, I had a decent understand of history and global movements, most likely more than the common Malaysian youth. But International Studies and even Journalism broadened my scope substantially. Yet I've also learned that it's not enough to learn only the things in the classroom. For everything I do and learn, it is vital to see how things fit and don't fit into God's culture and standard. A bonus obtained from intentionally studying two-fold is increased understanding and wisdom, so what was thought to be a terribly hard assignment turns into an enjoyable challenge (Yes, nerd speak here).
• The extent of God's unconditional love. I've met, mingled, laughed and cried with all kinds of people. Some things they do shock me from the innermost, other things move and inspire me. Sometimes I want to wring some necks, other times I give out hugs instead. Some people I know instantly are kindred spirits, others I wonder at the vast cultural barriers. I've seen the good that men can do, and I've felt close to heart the grave evil of humanity. Through all these, not only have I learned what it means to love unconditionally, but I've also better understood the extent of God's love and grace for us terribly-flawed creatures. 
• The appeal of words. Although I love writing, I had a narrow understanding of journalism and hence didn't think much for it. "Who wants to write hard news all the time?" But silly me, journalism is more than reports. It's the art for the search for truth, and to tell that truth to the best of one's ability, be it in print, broadcast, social media or photojournalism. For me it' words. I understand better the power of words to impart, impact and change, however insignificant that change may seem.
• The importance of a stable and healthy life. Don't run around like a headless chicken. I tend to say yes to almost every request that comes by, or attend every event. But it's not healthy to be running around with no focus, even though the tasks may be doable. For one, you lose track of things and run the risk of disappointing people. Secondly, you find yourself falling sick often, losing concentration, and quite literally losing your mind. It came to a point last year when I had to think very hard to recall a name or word, or what I did five minutes ago, or what promise I made to whom. For someone with a pretty good memory, this was frightening. I believe some people are built with the special capability to multi-task well. But I realize I'm not one of them. If I'm to do something well, I have to be there 100%. So keep focus and uphold priorities... and eat the vitamins your mom nags you to.
• The safeguard of limitations. Hence there's only so much one person can do. I used to be frustrated by the desire to save the world, only to be held back by limitations. But there's only one Savior, and that's not me. I'm simply called to do what I can through and by the talents given me. Knowing that now has given me much liberty in body, soul and mind. And as this quote aptly says, "Accepting your limitations is not giving up. On the contrary; it is saying, 'Here is what I cannot currently do, but this is something I will work at to learn, and God’s grace will sustain me.'" (Madison Hexter, The Rebelution)
• The sovereignty of God. For all that studying, I still don't know everything. I don't know why it rained yesterday and not today. I don't know why good people die young and questionable people live into their 80s. I don't know how to absolve human trafficking or ethnic conflicts. I don't know what I'm going to do next year, let alone next Saturday. I still don't know how to shoot properly and not scream when playing Left4 Dead. But one thing I know for certain, that there's a Higher Power in whom I can trust to know the answers to all that (including the Left4Dead lack of skill). And more. Plenty of times, more than I can count, I thought I knew better. I thought my way made more sense, felt more right. But I've been humbled each time. Although the process of humiliation is well, humiliating, I come out each time stronger and restored in hope, joy and purpose. I still don't know everything, but I don't need to know everything (refer previous point). I know who God is. Knowing that is enough.

I'm pretty sure those are not the only things I've learned. But it's three years, so it's difficult to summarize all. So I'd say these are the important points I've taken from that phase of life.

I thank God for the privilege of a good tertiary education, for the friendships forged, for life lessons learnt, and for the future untold.

My formal education has ended, but learning never does.

life update Unknown

This is what I've been doing ever since the beginning of November. If you were interested, or wondering whether I've fallen off the face of the earth.

• Traveling - Not as exciting as it sounds. It was mostly traveling between states... except the one trip to Cambodia.
• Celebrating - Birthdays, Christmas, New Year's, birthdays, farewells... and another birthday just this weekend.
• Cleaning - No matter how many times I re-organize my room, I find stuff that makes me question my sanity of ever keeping them in the first place.
• Eating - Which naturally comes with celebrating... and traveling... and cleaning.
• Bonding - It's been fun spending time with the little brother (although he sure has a lot of energy!) I'm glad for this long-term interaction, instead of only seeing him once a month.
• Settling - After 3 years of living in two/three places simultaneously, the quieter, more focused life has been good for the body, soul and mind.
• Romanticking - Well, given that the cute young man was leaving for work soon, much time was invested in that, ahem, particular relationship. 

Next post... 

laugh but don't sneeze Unknown

'Twas quite an eventful week. Our family got into a slight car accident (two tires flat, but no one was hurt), I was finally recovering from a bad cough, and God willing, am now done with my undergrad studies! 

*dances the jig*

To celebrate, I had dinner at Bubba Gump with Chester, family and relatives.

But that's not the point of this post.

It was Wednesday morning. I was doing the usual girl thing, staring at my overflowing closet wondering what to wear for my big IKEA date, when I did the unthinkable.

I sneezed. And pulled my back.

Yes, I give you permission to laugh.

Actually, it's because I was bending at a certain angle when I sneezed. The pain was so agonizing I almost blacked out. Maybe I did. I dunno. Thankfully, I managed to shuffle to the sofa and plop down in time. 

Then I found myself unable to get up.

It's scary when you realize you're alone and can't do a simple thing like sit up. Thank God I had grabbed my phone. And thank God I had people near and available. Chester, my mom, Lara, and Ethan drove over (we're all staying at different places), my cousin woke up, and my aunt came back a few hours later.

Long story short, I'm back home, resting. My back's much better. 

Lessons learnt:

- Take care of your body. It's only times like this when you realize how vital one back muscle can be.

- Don't be too proud to ask for help. You can't do everything by yourself.

- Be grateful always for the people who love you. Even though you're 24, they'll still ice your back, massage your cold clenched arms, feed you 100PLUS, help you get in and out of clothes, and support you when you stand and sit and lie down.  

And be careful next time you sneeze.

october sky Unknown

October 1.

Day One of my last month as a university student. That is, if I pass all my units, God willing!

Last month several statuses popped up on my Facebook news feed with the same lyrics, "Wake me up when September ends".

Although I wasn't one of those who posted that same status, I could totally empathize. September flew by, yet it was a tiresome month for me. I use tiresome in its fullest sense because it seemed no matter how hard I studied, or managed my time, I remained tired. There's always a season in each semester that I go through this. So this time I refused to succumb to pessimism and self-pity, but I guess last Wednesday, I finally reached the end of my tether and literally cried out to God.

God kept telling me to just seek Him, I knew He was walking right beside me, but He was still hard to reach. But you know what? That Wednesday broke something. I had several assignments to tackle the next few days, but I felt a real lightening of my burden and an incapability to panic, even today. How true that when you seek God even in the darkest craziest times, His light shines ever brighter.

Anyway, just a little post to let you know I'm alive, and ready for this new month. Here's to October. :)

Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. (Matt 11:28-29)

no es muy fácil Unknown

And here comes another post with a list. Only that this is the list I've been promising but haven't published.

It's my 2012 resolution list.

I know, I know it's like... May already. But bear in mind that I've already been working on them. :)

And the resolutions, in no particular order, are...

• Read through the whole Bible
• Continue to keep fit through dancing, running, and swimming
• Don't let my Spanish learning die...
• Practice my Malay more
• Get organized and neat (I fear I've somehow become quite the absent-minded slob)
• Find direction for life after studies
• Finish my undergraduate program with dignity
• Grow as a woman in grace, truth, and commitment
• Love people 
• Seek God

I think the last two are constant reminders that will be there for every year.

So that's it. Tell me what you think. :)

classic modern chick lit Unknown

Hello again, my faithful readers!

Well, it's been another long week, and I've spent this day sleeping in and addressing other parts of my life not related to studies. I'm appreciating a good night's rest of sleep lately. God knows very well just how much we humans need at least a day of rest a week.

Highlights of the week...

• Had the most delicious ribs ever... and triple cheese pizza.
• Went for an inter-campus day of prayer which was most refreshing to the soul. 
• Bumped into people I haven't seen in a long while.
• So grateful for Sarah and Rachel who put in 200% into our group project! I feel like I haven't done as much work as they have. =P
• Spent time with cousins and few friends celebrating a birthday.
• Enjoying Jane Austen's Northanger Abbey, which I had not read, and which I got for free thanks to the precious government.
• Challenged again by God, which is a strange thing to note, but definitely a crucial part of the week.

There are the downs as well, but I'm learning not to whine. I've seen and heard some sad things, which makes me realize how blessed my life has been. I have to remember that every single day is precious.

May you have a good weekend too, to be all pumped up and ready for the week ahead!

caramel tim tams Unknown

Hello my dear blog readers, whoever you are.

If there are even readers. LOL

Well. just a random update on life. I'm coming to the end of a rather long but productive week. One long Friday left, then I feel I've worked hard enough to enjoy the weekend. Things I've done this week are

• Had a mini sleepover
• Woke up at 6:30am yesterday and today. Really wan. (and my parents gasp!)
• Wore my new hat and loved it
• Drank ginger beer
• Handed out free breakfast
• And got a coffee bun and canned ice lemon tea for free
• Remained immobile in front of the screen for 3 assignments
• Ate frog porridge

Ah the mini joys!

I've got 4 weeks left to the semester. Can't believe it. The great future that is called The Working Life is looming nearer! Where doth this life take me?

April is ending. I'm turning twice the age I was 12 years ago very soon. Oh to be young again.

You can see this is going nowhere. Sorry, I needed a break from thinking.

and i hope Unknown

This was what I wrote in my journal last night. Nothing profound, just my thoughts.

Today is Easter. I didn’t celebrate much because well, we normally don’t. But anyhow, it’s been more of a gradual process the past week. And two things resonate in my mind – the Resurrection of Christ and Hope.

As I’ve been reading the Bible more - after a long dry spell - I realize that the good news of the Gospel is not just about Jesus dying for our sins, but that He has resurrected, and has overcome sin and death. It’s not a tale of sadness, it’s a tale of joy. It’s not about just defeating and leaving at that, it’s about living with victory. Without the resurrection of Christ, the story of the Gospel would only be half, His work on the Cross pointless.

And it is in the truth of the Resurrection that hope comes in. Now, to hope will not be in vain. What is this hope? It’s the hope for a life eternal after our time on this earth. It’s a hope that there’s a second chance for us all. It’s a hope for joy and peace that will come after the mourning and troubles. It’s a hope for a purpose and a future. It’s a hope that things will turn out right. All this I can now hope in confidence, because if death is defeated, what else will stand in the way of this new life given through the love of Christ, the grace of God the Father, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit?

I know this is not new revelation. But for me, it’s something I hadn't quite grasped. I always think about Jesus dying on the cross for our sin – my sin. And I get forlorn and convicted, thinking of all I did that drove my Lord to His death. I end up wallowing in self-pity, unworthiness, and an overwhelming sense of gratitude. But now I see that I tend to stop there. I was blind to the new life given. Because I felt like I have to work hard to maintain a sinless life. But the truth is – I’ve already died to that old life.

I do not discount the sufferings Christ had to go through for my sins. I’ve done too many grave things to ignore the penalty that was for me but Christ took away. But now I need to have more faith in the equal truth of His resurrection and what that means for me. I need to overcome my pessimism. I have to learn to hope.

rest Unknown

It's over.

My academic semester at the University of Miami ended yesterday. I powered through my finals, and moved all of my stuff -which turned out to be a lot - out of the room. Had a good 10-hour sleep last night after what seemed forever. And I did decent grocery shopping today. Yes, grocery shopping can be therapeutic.

I can't believe it's over just like that. I still remember how I felt the day I arrived to a very empty room, hungry and extremely exhausted. I knew no one, didn't know where things were, and had a huge cloud of uncertainty over me.

Yesterday when I left, the very empty room came back. But this time, I was full from a beef gyro, and was running on adrenaline. I was saying goodbye to a bit too many people, walked to places without hesitance, and had a shower of God-blessed confidence even though the rest of my time here is still in a blur.

Amazing how much can happen in 4 months. Dear God, I thank you. Some things you gave, some things you took away. But I have been and am still being purified because of all that.

Blessed be the name of the Lord.

maybe i should smile more Unknown

Yesterday I got a free Subway sandwich.

Today a random cashier told me I have a nice smile.

Little joys. =)

thanks for nothing Unknown

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow. - Melody Beattie

Today, I walked an hour to the home of a family I've never met before, and sat down to feast with them. Crackers, spinach dip, cheeses, turkey, mash potatoes, stuffed mushrooms, turkey stuffing, key lime pie, pumpkin pie, fruits, and coffee. I'm pretty sure I missed out many more. It's ridiculous, but ridiculously good! Oh, and the family was really nice and warm too. No seriously, I'm glad I was matched to this home. =)

It was in truth a lonely day for me.
No family.
No one from Malaysia.
Roommate left for home.
Friends on holiday or at their own Thanksgiving plans.
The whole campus is like a ghost town.

But I'm thankful.

Encouraged by two articles from Boundless, Thanks for Nothing and The Best Way to Live, I choose to be grateful.

For God's faithfulness, grace and love.
For my family's unfailing love.
For my baby brother on the way!
For everyone who's not here today but has been there for me every other day.
For the family who welcomed me into their home for the day.
For being denied the good because the best is on the way.
For not having everything that I can be grateful for what I do have.

No matter that the origin of today's festival is less than noble, it's still good to take time to be grateful.

Happy Thanksgiving! =)

God has a sense of humor Unknown

Sometimes a song pops to mind and I sing it. So here I was walking and singing this hymn I haven't thought of in ages...

When peace like a river attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll,
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say...

And then I tripped and slightly sprained my ankle.
Now what?

It is well, it is well with my soul.

True story.

designs Unknown

I'm writing this to take a break. I've been sitting here since 2pm, and it's now 6pm. Designing newspaper pages is waaayyy harder than anyone imagined it to be. Add to that the fact that I'm not as artsy-fartsy. So here's a grand thank you to all designers in the publishing industry!! I appreciate your works!

So anyway, it's just another Thursday. I'm in the computer lab listening to mouse clicks and keyboard taps while this guy down my aisle says random last names to a guy on the other end of the line. It's pretty funny when in the past 30 minutes all you hear is, "Johnson... Walker... Yes, with a 'W'... Finch..." Who are these people? And what is this guy organizing?

I've been looking for pictures for my newspaper pages and came across this nice painting of paddleboards.

by Pristine Cartera-Turkus

And a paddleboarding-in-action one by another artist...

by Michelle Bower

I'm intrigued by Michelle Bower especially, because she lives in the Cayman Islands, and what she does is paint the scenes around her. Now isn't that the life!

funnimals Unknown

This is Emo Zebra, better known as Emobra

And this is Okapi, cousin of Emobra.

No, actually, it's more the relative of Giraffe.

Wait, that's not Giraffe...

And this is the Groovy Emperor annoyed at the rain.

paddleboarding... Unknown

... was great fun!

• I had a really good arm and core workout - 2 hours of paddling!
• I got to admire the homes of the rich in Miami
• I got to admire their ridiculously huge yachts as well
• I saw a raccoon
• I also spotted an iguana
• It's just great to be out on the waters

Downside - No waterproof camera =(

And if you don't really know what paddleboarding is, here's an idea what it is. This pic closely resembles what we were doing, paddleboarding up and down canals.

suit up day Unknown

Suit Up Day! It's strange to walk around in a long sleeved shirt and pants and 5-inch heels when most everyone's dressed down. Took my time getting to class, I tell ya. Felt like I was a teacher or about to give a presentation. Oh, but I didn't wear the coat around because it's too hot!

My friends kept asking me what the occasion was, too. And I had to say that my friends back home made me do this. =P

Okay, going to the dining hall now... and in this attire!

tickled by the mundane Unknown

Today was a good day of normalcy... away from school.

I went grocery shopping, printed pictures, sorted pictures, cleaned my room, ironed my clothes, went dancing, had cereal for dinner.

Yesterday was a pretty good day too. I went to my morning class, then swam at the outdoor pool, went to my second class, then cycled to Branches to volunteer and help kids with their homework. There's an 8-year-old girl who says she can do 20 push-ups and wants to be a black-and-purple kitten for Halloween. Then I watched Mulan, and had pizza for supper on the swings outside my dorm.

Yeap. For some reason, I'm loving these 2 days. :)

Love.

pop! Unknown

I let the security guard seal my plastic bag and caught up with my aunt as she picked up a basket. I vacantly stared at the rows of offer items on the racks. Milk powder, plastic containers, T-shirts.

Then I realized...

It's been weeks since I stepped into any supermarket to shop.

I had the same strange feeling two weeks ago when I walked into Nichii. When was the last time I shopped?

Day in, day out. Uni, home, uni. Occasional meal at Medan or one of the malls. Then back home. Or uni.

I've been living in a bubble!

forgive and forget Unknown

This proverb has been stuck in my mind everyday since I read it.  It says a lot about the extent of forgiveness and love. Who knew that I had to put it into practice.

Someone changed my birthday on Facebook last weekend. Many people got confused, for which I felt extremely bad, because there were many sincere wishes and even a call in the late hours of the night. Anyway, I was really mad at the person who did such a thing thoughtlessly, and because I didn't know who did it, ended up chastising publicly on Facebook. Anyway, the person who did the prank admitted it and apologized. I forgave the person. Now the hard part is what comes after.

Because it was such a public matter, a number of people asked me about it, and were equally curious as to  who the culprit was. I guess God was preparing me beforehand, for the verse shone like neon lights in my head. I made up my mind not to tell anyone who it was. But not before I told one person - just one person, I could say out of coercion, but I really should have been stronger. Immediately I regretted it and repented.

It really is a struggle to rise above the norm. My handling of this situation wasn't perfect. Yet God's still gracious in teaching me and forgiving me too. It was a little incident, this birthday thing, but the lesson learned is eternal.

So, if you did want to ask, I'll just say here that I'm not going to tell who the person is. That person already feels bad enough, I don't think it'd be love if I repeat the matter.

It's not just to forgive. It's to forgive and forget.