Dear God,

I wasn't ready to say goodbye to 2010. I hadn't yet defined it. But it's one of those things in life one is meant to let go, even if I don't feel like it. And now that I've let it go, I see and understand why You meant it to be so.

It was a year of change. Change of environment and routine, change of direction, change in social circles, change in commitments, change of pace, change of self. Some were good, others bad.

It was a year of struggles. I struggled to adjust. I struggled with pride, the need to please people. I struggled with loss. I struggled with being open. I struggled to figure out who I am and who I want to be. I struggled to understand what really matters to You.

It was a year that taught me what truly matters in life; that everything else are add-ons, some even hindrances. You taught me to appreciate family, friendships, nature, times of solitude and rest, the value of diligence, the values of trust, faith and love.

It was a year to deal with myself. I became complacent. I fell into a place where I didn't even try to be better. I realized just how flighty I had become. I realized that I cannot wallow in my lackadaisical attitude. And when I knew, I didn't like what I saw.

And so You spoke to me. You told me to let go. You told me it was time to grow, to push ahead. That's why I wasn't ready to say goodbye to 2010. Because it meant saying hello to 2011, and accepting Your challenge to grow. I still wanted to kinda stay on the bridge.

Time flew too fast for me. I hardly had time to catch my breath. And now that the new year is here, I dread that the cycle continues. But I should trust You, shouldn't I? That a new year can mean a second chance, a refreshed start.

So now... I think I'm ready. I still haven't much a clue how to go about things, but I'm ready.


Thank You, Lord, for Your mercy and grace and faithfulness.
Thank You for 2010.